why life so suffering?

last nite, I Finally took those stupid medicine given by the heart specialist.. dunno which to take, might as well took all.. but seems tat medicine doesn't really works on it anymore. after taken, it still pain like hell till this noon time. I was asking myself How many more sunshine can i enjoy? none of us know.. But it's a good thing tat we dunno everything.
Keep on saying dunno to others.. am i really dunno.. how i hope so.. why god so cruel..let me know something i dun wish to know, yet dun let me know those things i wanna know..
Suddenly.. Suddenly i turn speechless.. suddenly i being freezed.. it just like a sunny day suddenly turn cloudy day then thunderstorm coming.
Who can be blame? it's me. myself. like wat Mariah Carey said,

Dun ever take anybody for granted, coz you never know wat you might lost someday, and you'll never get a chance to tell them how you really feel.

pls understand it be4 it's too late. Now i understand and i know wat i should do and be. But, It's too late..